The Sex Diary of a
Vol. 11 Chapter VIII
[The following also was laid aside for a chapter on cunts, and it and the episode with the ballet girl are put together as illustrations of the potentiality of gold in getting women in the lower ranks of life — perhaps in all ranks if the bid be high enough.]
At a spectacular piece I twice noticed a shortish but sweet looking ballet girl with exquisite legs — on the second occasion I waited at the stage door to see her come out. So different do women look in walking dress to what they do when on the stage, that it is difficult to recognize them, but looking sharply, I discovered her leaving with a group of others. It was a coldish night in the beginning of March.
At first I hesitated to follow her, for her air of quiet respectability deterred me somewhat, and I could not well accost her when surrounded by others. But my cock swelled with desire, and under its stimulating influence and with erotic hopes and visions I followed her — as I've done scores of women — till first one, then another of the group went off, and quickly she was left with two others only, who walked with her thro an obscure and nearly deserted street till they entered a public house. — After reflecting a minute I entered also, and found them sitting in a private bar — no other person there — eating sandwiches and drinking ale — I ordered a glass of wine and stood looking at them, they looked at but took no notice of me. I saw that in bon-net she was as handsome as on the stage, and my pego now nearly lifted me off the ground with stiffness as I thought of her legs and breasts. — Reckless now under its influence, I asked them all to have port wine. Two accepted but she refused — I ordered a bottle.
Now I asked why they were out so late, not alluding to the theatre, neither did they in their answer. — I got amorously suggestive, the two laughed — for directly fucking enters the mind women are pleased — but didn't reply till I asked them all to come home and sleep in my bed, tho I had neither house nor bed where I could go. Was it large enough? asked one. — What would I do? then asked the other. —"Whatever you like, what shall it be?" — More laughing then. — "One at a time's enough isn't it?" said my fancy. — "It would be with you." — "We must go," said she. All prepared quickly to go, and then only she took a glass of wine and immediately departed, so hurriedly — as if scared — that I didn't wait for change in payment for the wine for fear of losing sight of them. I heard them laugh as they got outside and suppose it was about me, then hoping I should at some time catch her alone, I followed quickly.
When outside I saw her ahead and alone, the others had gone off. In a minute I was by her side, telling her I had seen her in the ballet, admired her lovely form, and asking her to let me go home with her. She stopped, refused, professed surprise at my asking. I grew bolder. — "Nonsense my darling, I'll give you a sovereign." — "I won't — I must get home, it's so late — besides I can't." — Then ready to empty my purse to have her, — "I'll put you into a cab and give you three sovereigns." — Then she stopped, looked at me, then looked back to see if any one was noticing her. A little further persuasion and then, "I can't stop more than ten minutes then." — I acceded to every condition. driven to a free coffee shop, a shabby one which I knew of, and were soon in a bedroom. She pulled down her veil to hide her face as she approached the house. If I want a woman not regularly on the town, it's best to bid and at once very high for her favours, I ought to have bid three at first, for I know that tho ballet girls will fuck for love, they rate their cunts high if they are to be paid for them.
I'd been eulogizing the beauty of her form when she consented to come, and she'd said "I'll shew you that but no more, mind." A funny reservation which I thought a joke, or perhaps that she had her monthlies on. But I wanted to see her nude so agreed, and would have done anything to get into a bedroom, knowing that a woman who has tasted the pleasure of a pego — and I was sure she had — would never resist one stiff standing in front of her to her hand. A stiff red capped prick has a fascination, and a knowing cunt heats, tingles and sweats its lubrication at the sight of one. — After taking her bonnet off she sat on the bedside, I began lifting her clothes and when they were up to her garters she stopped me. "That's all." — "Nonsense, I must see your thighs." She lifted them very slowly, stopping short of her motte, and she'd drawers on. — "There then." — I pushed my hand between them on to the notch. She closed her thighs tightly. — "No more." — "Well take your drawers off, I can't see as much as I did in the ballet."
As she resisted whilst yet she laughed, and as I hate being played with so by a woman, I lost my temper. — "Don't be a fool, I'll fuck you or I won't pay you." — "I wouldn't have come then." — "Look," said I, pulling out my prick, stiff as a maypole. She did look at it and long whilst saying. — "No — no." — But it excited her and a minute after she was feeling it and I her pretty quim. — Soon after she was in chemise at the bedside, thighs apart, and the lovely notch exposed and I examining it with lustful delight. "I'm very small made, am I not?" said she in an apologetic tone, as if she wished to warn me.
It was perhaps the smallest cunt I ever felt in a woman. The notch approached the usual size, but the love avenue was quite tight to my finger, and I thought my pego could never get up it. But strangely enough, that very idea seemed to stiffen it to an unbendable state, it was cast iron as the gland touched the small orifice, and it glided right up without stopping, till I touched the end of the tube and hit hard. — She sighed but nothing more. I felt her genital lubricating juices soon issuing and softening round my tip, but as her pleasure came on, the tightening of her avenue almost hurt me [it was when my prick was more sensitive as I have already often described, and I preferred an easy cunt]. As she spent, I felt as if the gland was being nipped by a hand. The tightness was sensible to my prick as it dwindled voluptuously, and its compression was then exquisite to it, as I stood holding up her thighs. Then, when with a parting nip at my prick tip as it quitted her, and when afterwards, my finger searched the mucilaginous soft interior, it still was tight to it. I never felt such a tight cunt before. Not one of the many young hairless cunted ones had such a tight cock pit, and I gloried in having fucked this clipper.
She was as many of her class are, vain as a peacock, I'd found that out before. I praised her cunt, said it was delicious, my eulogies delighted her so, that instead of ten minutes she stopped nearly an hour, stripped all but stockings, to let me see her exquisite form, and I fucked again her lubricious unwashed channel. I wouldn't let her wash it, and indeed think she never could have got the sperm out if she had. I took a curious fancy to her on account of her quim and she — as I have found all very tight cunted ones — seemed happy in talking about it. I asked her to meet me again. She said she couldn't and told me much, but whether true or not I cannot say. — "You'll never see me again." She'd left the theatre that night for good, had done with the stage, should leave London next day. — "No, I'm not going to be gay, I never have been gay. A gentleman makes me an allowance, he did it to me first. Yes and he put me on the stage, he pays for my dancing there, they don't pay me." Three or four men besides him and myself she admitted, not more, had had her. "All have said I was very small made." — These in answers to my questions. Then she admitted that she wanted fucking just when I spoke to her in the public house, her friend was out of town but would meet her on the morrow.
One or two girls had felt her cunt and she theirs, to judge if hers really was small. "It will be a bad look out if I get in the family way, and I hope you haven't done it."
It's always amusing to hear what a woman says of herself, so retain this narrative, but principally because of her tight cunt. I have had others tightish but never such a tight one in a grown woman. — She said she was nineteen and looked that age, the hair of her head, cunt, and armpits was dark.
I went twice to the theatre afterwards, but never saw her there again nor elsewhere. She said she was going to be married.
About six one warm evening in autumn I was near a market at * * *. The great traffic of the day was over as I sauntered out of curiosity thro a street I'd never seen before, one of much trade, but where every shop was closed for the night, and but few pedestrians in it. — Near a public house stood two porters talking. At the corner of a narrow street, three common girls were lolling against the wall, talking and larking with a couple of lads looking scarcely sixteen years old, the girls seeming of about the same age.
Sturdy, thick built wenches, looking like market or coster girls (they were) and clad in good tho coarse work-soiled clothing and with short petticoats and boots suitable for their work and class. They had dirty hands and looked sweaty, dusty, and work worn. Two had hats, the other none, she was a superbly handsome creature with very light colored hair of bright hue, which evidently crimped naturally, a florid face, retroussé nose, and big mouth with white teeth, she'd light blue eyes, a fine bust and large hips, and the very picture of coarse health she looked. As I took her points in at a glance and thought her beautiful, then I also thought of her secret charms, wondered if she'd been fucked, and thought how well she'd look if washed and well dressed, those accessories of beauty.
I stood looking up now and then seemingly at the houses to hide my object, which was to see her and the group, and to watch their horse play. The lads were chaffing the girls, one snatched a kiss and got a slap on his head, tho the wench was evidently pleased. — The other lad suddenly made a dig at the fair haired one's clothes outside her grummit, making some re-mark which I couldn't hear, but at which all laughed. He ran off up the short narrow street, pursued by the girl who seemed really angry, and in a second they had turned a corner and were out of sight. The girls with hats and the lad remaining looked round the corner laughing, and resumed their position against the wall. The lad loudly said. "Tom wants it bad don't he Loo?" — "I dunno, ask him," said the girl. He on that put his hand round her and snatched another kiss, disarranging her bonnet in doing so, got another hard slap and a push, and "I'll kick your bloody arse if yer does that again." All this occurred almost simultaneously, and far quicker than this account of it is written. The street was quite quiet, and every word easily heard.
The group took no notice of me, neither did the very few passers by. The sight gave me a spasmodic, voluptuous throb in my pego, for I was very fit that evening, and with sexual instinct — I suppose — slowly I walked up the narrow street, as any other pedestrian might, and turning the corner saw the couple struggling together, he snatching at her petticoats as before, she hitting him. "Let's feel it, Jenny." "Get away you blackguard." — "I've felt it." "You ain't, yer liar," came clearly to my ears as I turned the corner. — My appearance immediately stopped the fun, and with a parting slap from her the lad ran off, leaving her alone with me, no other person was in the passage — A foot-way only — indeed excepting at market hours few passed that way.
Quickly as thought and to begin a conversation with her, — almost anything does for that, — I asked her the way to a place and she began to tell me. — "Shew me the way, you are so lovely and I'll pay you." — The opportunity had come so suddenly that I'd not time to think about a course of action. Civilly she began to ex-plain the road, then thanking her I said, "How lovely you are, I've been watching you and longing to be him." — "What? — and she laughed. "Yes — come with me and I'll give you two sovereigns."
"Whart?" — said she again standing amazed with staring eyes. — Just then some one approached. "Is it that way?" said I as a blind. — Amazed as she had seemed by my offer, she took the hint, and began explaining the way, pointing to it. — In a few seconds the pedestrian had vanished and again I said "I'll give you two sovereigns to come with me." Again she repeated, "Whart?"
Then reflecting she added, — "Ain't you just a cheeky one." — "I will by God, and more, you are so lovely." — She laughed, then in a strangely confused and half ashamed manner, looked at me hard and shook her head. — "Do." — "No thankee Sir I can't." — "Do, I'll be back here to meet you in a quarter of an hour and I'll give you two bright sovereigns." — 'No." Again she shook her head, again I pressed and repeated my offer. At length — "I'm so dirty." — "Never mind, you're lovely, and it will be dark." — Twilight was al-ready coming on. "Mind two sovereigns?" "What for? And I've got no bonnet." "Never mind, in a quarter of an hour be here, will you? We'll go in a cab." — "Yer ain't alying?"
Another pedestrian passed whilst these few words were being exchanged, and as she — a woman now — appeared, I pointed again as if seeking direction, and the girl did the same. None are so cunning as those in lust, and I think she was a little so now.
Just then the lad reappeared at the corner and I began pointing as before as a blind. She saw the lad might suspect, and not wishing to be caught by him talking to a gentleman, bawled out, "The gent wants to know the way to * * * *." He approached and told me — pointing in another direction. — "Show me and I'll give you twopence." He went ahead. "In twenty minutes here," — said I in a low voice, and followed the lad cursing him in my heart for interrupting us, and wondering if the two sovereigns would bring back the wench to the meeting place. I saw that the offer of two sovereigns had quite staggered her, she who perhaps had never been paid five shillings for her pleasures — if paid at all — for she evidently was no strum-pet. But all women are paid for their favours either in meal or malt.
As soon as I was well away from the place I gave the lad threepence, and off he went. A few minutes after, I got into a four wheeled cab, and setting myself well back told the driver, to go at walking pace along the street where the group had been standing. There stood the same lot seemingly about to separate as the cab passed them, they didn't see me. In three or four minutes I went back again at a trot. The lads were gone, the girls going in another direction. I was delighted. I've many times been helped in my amours by cabmen, and through the window said, "Follow those girls — don't lose sight of them, I don't want to be seen." "All right, Sir." — At the end of the street where it joins a large thoroughfare, he drove past but never lost sight of them, and stopped as they did.
I could then see the three girls standing together and talking for ten minutes. Then to my delight two went off leaving my wench alone, who retraced her steps very slowly, stopping from time to time and looking back, then turned towards the place of rendezvous at the corner of the narrow street. She stopped there for a second as if considering, wiped her face with a dirty handkerchief, arranged her hair with her hand, then quickly went up it and round the corner — I got out of the cab, paid him, told him to wait and went after her. It was now quite dusk. There she stood and when I'd joined her, said she was afraid to come, she thought she'd tell me to prevent my waiting uselessly. After a few words of persuasion and the two sovereigns offered again, she was in the cab with me and off we drove.
After we had been in the cab a minute I kissed her, she returned it saying, "You're a cheeky one." Soon after, — "If you'll stop here two or three minutes I'll get me a bonnet. — Where are you ataking me? I really can't stop out late. — What are you agoin to do?" — "Never mind your bonnet — I want to feel your little cunt and you to feel my prick." — "Oho — no you shan't — you have bloomin' cheek. — I'm sorry I've comed." — "Don't be a fool, you'll have two sovereigns." — She chuckled and on went the cab. — "I'm hungry. — It's near my time to grub, and they'll won-der where I am." — "I'll get you something," and at a public, getting out but keeping her in the cab, I took her ginger beer and gin in it and two big buns. — On we drove, and then, but with much resistance, and drop-ping her bun in preventing me, I got my fingers well on a moist cunt. — After a further struggle my finger remained there which seemed to quiet her much, but she seemed offended and remarked. "I ain't that as yer thinks, I works for my living and pretty hard too." — "You've been fucked and you live with a man." — "No I don't, I lives with the old people." — she didn't deny the fucking. By the time we reached the house I was hugging her closely and had felt her lubricious orifice both inside and out, as far as the position enabled me, and satisfied myself she wasn't virgin. She got again silent, seemingly thinking whilst enjoying the play of my digits on her quim. Such are lovely moments for any couple, and it was I'm sure for her, tho she seemed frightened at what she was doing.
The mistress who knew me was astounded to see a common wench without a bonnet, and in a whisper hoped all was right. She feared consequences, suspecting I'd brought a chance virgin and had made her screwed. In the bedroom the girl curious — as all such as — looked everywhere. — "It's a baudy shop, ain't it?" — "Yes, take off your things." — "No." She resisted that earnestly as a half modest girl would, but longing to see her notch, I pushed her on the bed and then her clothes up. "Oh now, I won't." A more dingy sight of petticoats and chemise I don't recollect, but her fat backside, plump thighs, and smooth belly were white and clean, and the prettiest little notch lay between them. Crisp, curly, short hair surrounded a delicate coral stripe, not much was on the motte, and it looked most enticing, was the charming cunt of sixteen. She was a little over sixteen. A cunt is in its highest beauty at about that age, I now think, tho in my youth I loved them larger and very hairy.
I produced my pego which she quietly admired long — and I felt sure from her looks she hadn't seen many — in delicious silence. Soon after she handled it whilst my finger titillated her. — "Do you want it?" — No, said she wriggling. "Let me fuck you." — "No," said she squirming about — then quickly after. — "Oh! — Don't — aha — shove it in," — murmured she very vulgarly. In a second we were fucking at the bedside, she was full and randy, and soon we spent in unison. She was young, artless, hot blooded, sighed much, and gave way freely to her pleasure. — My prick lingered in her long whilst I looked down at her white belly and thighs, and anon at her dirty linen. But the lovely con-junction ceased, the evidences of our pleasure rolled out, and I pushed up her thighs, holding them apart to admire the pearly issue. Then she washed her cunt giving a mere outside sluice, and spite of her struggles, I washed her cunt outside again myself and much to her astonishment. — Had she been a strumpet she'd have washed it up enough. Her washing in fact showed she was not habitually gay, and her pleasure in seeing my pego, and a shyness of manner, made me sure she was no harlot. "Has no one washed your cunt but yourself?" "Lord no — what do you think — what did you want to do it for?" — "For pleasure." — "Ho — ho — I must go." — "You shan't yet, get naked and so will I." — "Oho, no — there then, I won't do that." — "Have you never been naked to a man?" — "Never, but only to my own chap." — He'd first had her when sixteen, she said. He had a cart, was getting on, but drank much.
I insisted, she stripped, I did the same, and in nudity, stockings excepted, we played with each other's sexual organs. Persuading her was delicious, for she was modest and no sham, and she was evidently voluptuously delighted as in silence she pulled my prepuce up and down, and handled my balls as if she'd never seen a full grown ballocks before. Not a bit was it like the experienced manipulation of a harlot. I questioned her, and she answered straight, I felt sure, tho no doubt suppressing many things. — "You've been fucked." — "Why, in course, you knows that." — "How did I?" — "You knows it." — "How many men have fucked you?" — "Only one." — "That's a fib." — "It's true, so help me God. — You's the only other chap. — Why I ain't had it two months, and lives at home at * * * *. I ran away once with him, the night I was done — but they got me back. — So help me God it's true. — Yes I lets him when he gets the chance, but they says he's taking on with another gal. — I'll serve her out if I gets hold on her." — Then my prick being stiff and her cunt ready with our handlings again, they joined. — Then our sexual ecstasies over — and didn't she enjoy the fuck? — I had a cab got and put her into it with two sovereigns in her hand. — She'd never in her life had a sovereign before of her own, she said. — Many a girl has had her first bit of gold from me, has found out the ready money-value of her cunt.
"No, it's no good your awritin' me and I reads badly, and praps they'll get hold on it, tho they can't read." But she agreed to meet me again and I wrote down time and place. — "I'll put on a bonnet next time, but I can't put on my best things, they'll want to know why and I'd like to come earlier." So it all came about, I met her that day week and she was cleaner, had better boots and white stockings. She was a fine model from head to foot, such solidity of flesh, so satiny, and tho she said she never took a bath in her life, she was as sweet as a nut. I fucked, then gamahuched her, giving her her first pleasure that way. "No," no tongue had touched her clitoris before, she said. Then I fucked her again and she went off with two sovereigns again, all I'd promised. She earned at work sometimes eighteen pence a day, sometimes not that sum. When with her father he gave her nothing of her earnings. "But he keeps me."
She told me much more about herself, but evidently not all, how she sometimes went out with a barrow, and after work was done into the streets to talk with her friends. Her "young man" had said, "that if he caught me with another chap he'd smash both our bloody noses, and now he's after another gal." — "What if he knew I'd fucked you?" — "Dunn — but he can't know. — Shiners ain't got at barrows are they?" — She said that the two shiners promised had made her come with me. — "You'd make plenty if you liked." — She knew what I meant — looked long at me and shook her head. — "I ain't agoin' at that game — no thankee — not if I knows it. He'll marry me I think now if father let his — if he won't I'll run away agin. — Yes, I'll come here with you agin if you like, but I can't have a letter if you knowed where I lives even."
A splendid strapping, healthy creature she was, many rich would give anything for such an offspring. — A bit fit for a Prince's prick, and what a lovely cunt! Yet a coster spent in it first, and will yet take his pleasure in it.
I had her once more. She quickly got at my tool and played with it as if lewed to her bum hole. — It was deliciously exciting to see her at my prick. — She grinned and admitted her young man had had her in the interval. — "No, only once — shan't tell you where. — Give me? — nothing he didn't — he never gived me nothing — never he didn't, but he says he'll marry me" — her very words. — My letch was over, her coarseness annoyed me, and I saw her no more.
[Will she marry? her sexual enjoyment was immense, her delight in handling my pego and even in showing me her naked beauties at our third meeting was delicious. Lasciviousness had set in, the delight of the secret meetings with a gentleman gave her un-disguised pleasure and she'd have let me fuck her to any extent. When I told her I could name no time to meet her again, but would some day be at the market where she talked with friends when the day's work was done, her countenance fell, and she became dull. — Did the sovereigns make her turn harlot? Or fucking and sovereigns together — or did she become a virtuous coster's wife? — And she also was fucked when sixteen, all her class are, they will be fucked. — Ladies must only frig themselves till they are married, — until five and twenty often. What a loss of pleasure! ]